This concept and or idea of there being many parts to us, that we have past versions of ourselves running around inside our hearts, mind, and souls; for me the little girls of my past, little Becky's that were not honored or seen. The idea of playing as an adult is a bit foreign to… Continue reading The Little Girls
Category: love
great expectations
So many scribbles, notes, and pieces of me laying around waiting to be put down here. My fingers stay shriveled from all the showers - "I'm not going to tell the story the way it happened, I am going to tell it the way I remember it". Scribbles, remember those? A few minutes of focus,… Continue reading great expectations
he was my rain
"I always wanted to love Eve as Denny loved her, but I never had because I was afraid. She was my rain. She was my unpredictable element. She was my fear. But a racer should not be afraid of rain; a racer should embrace the rain. I alone could manifest a change in that which… Continue reading he was my rain
The Heart Break Special
Both are under scrutiny. The stench of lies and ego fog any love cloud from forming in such conditions. Starring at countless ceilings, so many blind spots both spiritually, sexually, and emotionally. There was no surrendering, not anymore. I feel crazy thinking of your words and you so freely throw punches as if you think… Continue reading The Heart Break Special
Blind Love
#historicalprose 5/15/2001 So love is blind and now my heart runs free. Only stopping to glance at cowboy and then running off into the sunset. Away from all that is love, I begin to heal and strive to be a part of something beautiful again someday. However, my eyes stay closed, so fearful. I'm no… Continue reading Blind Love
Birthday Blues
1/1/2016... In the light of day the room seemed completely different but the stench of that fight lingered. It's been almost six months with Kyle; So like and yet so unalike each other, by far the most transparent relationship I've ever had. Here in Panama the winds wail and I cry for the past and… Continue reading Birthday Blues
old quotes and looking beyond
I found this journal of my mom's, she kept her own quote book of sorts, I had no idea and sadly and or ironically I have had one that I have filled since I was in my teens. Friends wrote in it, acquaintances, strangers and of course family. I use my quote book so often… Continue reading old quotes and looking beyond
rêves les plus fous
As sleep, naps and rest elude me I search for ways to rest myself, ways to release the demons, memories of us, memories of her, worries, sorrows, they all create a wall of sorts for me on a daily basis, if I can get through the wall I can be at peace but they join… Continue reading rêves les plus fous
Baby Loves to Run
No longer running from or towards him, addressing past runs and what the consequences have been, so much more than dehydration. The dried flowers, my new running routine, and the echoes of sweet words and sweat are all that remain. "Taught her young, the only things she'd need to carry on, he taught her how… Continue reading Baby Loves to Run
TBT “away from love”
May 3rd, 2001 Perhaps my hatred for her comes out of fear. Fear that she could take away my greatest asset, or maybe that fear I have never spoken of, the one where I often catch a glimpse of my own weakness in her smile. I wish right now that I could get up and… Continue reading TBT “away from love”